Sunday, March 4, 2012

Legally Blind?

Three day weekend? Amazing. Weather getting a little warmer? I'm not complaining. Eating at Noodles and Company and hanging out with my cousin at the mall? Fun and more fun. Being unable to see past my hand for the past couple of days? Well...yeah that's a problem. You see, I've been unable to wear my contacts (or at least one of them) for a couple of days now. Funny, I never thought my vision was that bad...until now. But I have finally moved past the denial phase, and have accepted that my vision is about as bad as a legally blind person's.

What happened to my eye exactly? Well, according to the Doc I got a paper cut on my eye. Rather, he said it was "like getting a paper cut". The rest of the explanation was more scientific, and I won't bother you with boring details. The point is, apparently I injured my eye and it's pretty much like getting a paper cut. So Doc gave me some eye drops and I should be good to go. I do have to get a new pair of glasses. I'm still trying to decide if I should get hipster glasses or go for the smart librarian look. Oh, and my eye is extremely sensitive to light and will be for some time. So to survive the next couple of days I have to be like a vampire and avoid all sources of light. My eyes might still be really sensitive after that.

What you talking about? That's one of Peter Pan's fairies!
Couldn't resist, sorry. Well if you see some random person that suddenly runs into a wall or clear door, or is running into things constantly...it's probably me.

Saturday, March 3, 2012

My Gullible Goldfish Moment

I must live in a box. A really small box. Apparently stores don't just sell the original goldfish crackers anymore. You know, the orange fish crackers that are always smiling and are kinda salty. Those crackers. Well I found out recently that these goldfish crackers now come in a variety of different colors, and even as pretzels!

See, look! I'm not lying- pretzel goldfish do exist!
I first learned about these new goldfish crackers at lunch, when I noticed one of my friends had brought goldfish-shaped pretzels. "That pretzel looks like a goldfish cracker." My keen observation skills surprise even me sometimes. My friend couldn't help but give me a weird look. "That's because it's a pretzel goldfish. It's a pretzel in the form of a goldfish....they have all sorts of different kinds of goldfish crackers now." Sad to say, I was excited about this new bit of information. "Really? That's so cool! I only knew about the original goldfish crackers." "How can you not know this?" said my friend in an exasperated voice, giving me a pretzel to try. Obviously it was common knowledge that pretzel goldfish were being sold for quite awhile now. I tried to think of a good answer to my friend's question, but failed at doing so. Instead I merely replied with an obvious statement, "goldfish crackers are really good with tomato soup." Our goldfish conversation was abruptly ended by the class bell. Ironically enough, later that day my teacher gave my class goldfish crackers-the original kind-which were leftovers from a previous class. It was a good way to end the day. And then comes, what I call, my gullible goldfish moment.

*Sometime later--after school*
"So I learned that they have different kinds of goldfish now. Like pretzel goldfish, and goldfish that come in different colors," I said in response to the typical how was your day? question. My dad nodded. "Well you know they just came out with a new type of goldfish. The goldfish don't smile anymore, they frown." "Wow, that's really weird. And kinda depressing. We should go buy some frowny goldfish! I want to see what they look like." My dad and I talked about this new kind of goldfish for several minutes. It was only when my mom walked in, listened to our conversation very briefly, and then shook her head did I realize there were no frowny goldfish.

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